Would the real SEAL please clap your fins! SATIRE ON THE HIGH SEAS
Sat, 22 Feb 1997 15:14:51 -0500 (EST)
I want to lodge a formal protest on behalf of the one, true, original
seal. I am speaking of course of that world famous, beloved Tupperware Seal.
Did you ever stop to think that the only reason anyone signed up for
anything was because they thought they would get a container of fresh lunch
meat and a chance to meet the Tupperware Seal. He has been around since the
1950's and it is my personal belief that everyone is trying to get mileage
off his fame.
I went to a Boy Scout Klondike Derby one time. It wasn't even held in
the Klondike. We didn't go to Alaska, and the snow melted two days before
Another Council refers to their winter event as the Ididerod after the
famous Alaskan race. I'll bet there are Eskimos massing for a revenge strike
Another time I participated in a Paul Bunyan camporee. Would you
believe that Paul Bunyan never showed up! Rumor has it that he was out all
night with some Babe. Talk about truth in advertising!
A famous astronaut once said, "The Eagle has landed". The nerve of
those NASA people naming a space vehicle after an American symbol. Why they
even went so far as to name one of their shuttle craft after Captain Kirk's
vessel "The Enterprize". But, in all fairness, Captain Kirk stole the name
from a famous aircraft carrier and they stole it from a wooden sailing ship.
The worse thing of all is that nobody is even aware of this. People are
being misled and decieved. Imagine the shock and dissappointment of someone
attending SEAL training with Sea Explorers and learning that they are not
even in the Navy! The horror of completing a week of Woodbadge camp and
learning that the award you are working for is actually 2 wood beads and not
1 wood badge!
Why if this trend continues, the next thing you know is that we might
have to tell adults that register for Leadership positions in Scouting and
Exploring that it isn't
JUST ONE HOUR PER WEEK, it is a committment for youth, and an investment in
their future and in the future of this country. Where will it all end?
My humble apologies to everyone who has ever had their name or idea used
by someone else. Mr. Christopher Columbus, I know you were a real Sea
Explorer, please excuse us for using that term. To all you Army Scouts,
sorry about Baden-Powell and the BSA ripping you off like that.
Signed: Jonathan Taylor Thomas
(Yes, that is my real name, really! Would I kid you?)