scouts-l Mail Archive for November of 1999: Re: the wall
Richard C. Ickler (icklerr@EARTHLINK.NET
Mon Nov 01 1999 - 18:25:54 CST
I've seen it work both ways. Sometimes it works out the way it is in
your case. More often though, Scouting is one area where the father
actually will spend quality time with their son. I have always been
actively involved with my sons' lives but Scouting was one place I
really felt that I got quality time with them in a setting that we
all enjoyed. We have one boy in our troop who is an independent
businessman who tends to be a work-a-holic. This year he has decided
to become active with the troop and I have seen his son really
blossom because the son feels like his father is actually putting
spending time with him ahead of his work.
I think the key is to be sure to keep your priorities straight. If
your son feels neglected or that it really doesn't matter to you if
he is there, you do need to back off. If your son feels that you are
there because you want to share experiences with HIM he probably will
enjoy it. I think it is basic parenting - your son needs to feel he
is getting HIS share of your attention. Like anything in life it is
a balancing act but many kids thrive with parents who are active
youth leaders. I know I never regret the time I spent as a
Scoutmaster or Assistant and both of my sons (19 and 21 now) have
always seemed to appreciate my involvement. They understood that a
lot of the interesting things we did would not have happened if I
wasn't willing to be a leader.
Long Beach Area Council (CA)
From: Jack Young [SMTP:youngjack@HOTMAIL.COM]
Sent: Monday, November 01, 1999 9:19 AM
Subject: the wall
I've been very active in scouting for 3 years now as a webelos den
fund raiser and scoutmaster. All of a sudden my son is saying that
doesn't want to be in scouts and he wants one on one time with me.
he probably has been giving me clues about this but I've not been
attention. This makes me wonder if i've been doing it for him or for
The answer seems clear.
So I've let my troop comm chair know that I am resigning and my son
greatly releived and down right happy to have more time with me. I'm
flattered and I know I am doing the right thing for my family but I
troubled about this as well.
Has anyone else made this journey? Got any comments?
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