Scouts-L Mail Archive for September of 1999: Disruptive boy in a den
Disruptive boy in a den
Laurie K. Burnaby
Sat, 4 Sep 1999 09:37:55 -0400
At 09:03 AM 9/2/99 -0500, Carol C wrote:
>We had a third grader join scouting this year. The child requires an adult,
one on one, >with him all day at school in an attempt to control him. The
child attacks the other
>boys at school at school all the time and the other boys are afraid of him.
The 2 >existing dens , one group of leaders said they didn't think they
could handle him and >didn't want to take him. The other group said they
would quit and take their boys out of >scouting.
Let me preface my remarks by saying that I am so dedicated to the scouting
program that my wife thinks the BSA is in reality a cult and the uniforms
must contain brainwashing substances.
I had a similar problem in my pack 3 years ago and lost a whole year of
boys, as did one of your other respondents. When asked about a similiar
situation recently by another unit ,while wearing my Unit Commissioners
hat, I did some checking with Council after making my initial suggestions.
I suggested a "Lone Scout" type program. A caregiver or parent would be
the Den Leader and accompany the boy to Pack Meetings.
We discussed this at a commissioners meeting and my DE somthing along the
lines of: Your pack does not have to accept any boy nor does a leader EVER
have to put up with this kind of a situation. Our job is to protect and
lead boys not put them at risk.
I guarentee that it will never again happen in my Pack or any unit I work
with as UC. The PC answer is that "all boys deserve a shot a scouting". I
agree, but as leaders we need to control the situation. We must look to
the needs of the greater number here. Many may be horrified at this
statement but this is reality. I have two sons who are ADHD so I can handle
chaos with the best of them. I have worked with many kids over my 13 years
in Scouting as a leader. I had to remove one boy from one of my dens when I
was a WEBELOS leader because otherwise all would suffer.
Someone suggested a transfer of your other scouts to another Pack. I think
this would be the most disasterous move you could make. Might as well give
up your charter. DO NOT LET ONE BOY RUIN YOUR PACK. REALITY CHECK TIME HERE
PEOPLE. I wish I could sit down with you and your committee and say this
face to face. Your pack is a family. Here in Hingham, MA each elementary
school has a pack. The boys are with friends. To change packs usually means
to quit scouting soon after.
If you feel that removing this boy will create a personal or community
problem get your Unit Commissioner or DE involved. DO IT TODAY. FIND THEM AT
HOME. DON'T WAIT. Don't let leaders leave this way. It's too hard to get
Carol, I'll stop here. Please don't you stop. Make the hard decision. Your
DE or UC will help.
email me at email@example.com if I can help in any way.
Yours in Scouting
Laurie K. Burnaby
Old Colony Council - Canton, MA
Great Ponds District
Cub Master Pack 4
I used to be an Eagle
and a good old Eagle too