Re: Remember Scouting is a Safe Haven...
Jon Dixon (dixonj@COLORADO.EDU)
Tue, 11 Aug 1998 08:57:14 MDT
From: Mark Riffey <mr@GRANITEBEAR.COM>
> If the time required to deal with
> the distractions/trouble/whatever-you-wish-to-call it related to this boy
> is *significant* and incessant, where do you draw the line? Do you draw the
> line at all? How do you explain to the other parents that their boy is not
> getting as much of the Scouting program as he could be, that is, when it is
> for this reason and no other? Do you explain it at all, or is this a
> "life's lesson" for the other boys, much less their parents? How do I
> handle it if my boy doesnt get his 1/13th share of my attention (there are
> 13 in our den) meeting after meeting after meeting (in fact, he rarely
> does), and he recognizes that it is because my time is 'monopolized' (bad
> word, but cant think of another right now) by these issues? So many
> questions, and I have few answers.
In my experience, it is necessary to have some form of discipline
which is consistent and understood by all. While I would not want to
turn away a boy who wishes to be a scout, he also needs to show that
he does indeed want to be a scout. And while certain
allowances/accomidations need to be made for ADHD, like we would do
for blindness or any other disability, there are also certain
standards of behavior which need to be adhered to.
One of the main reasons this is needed is because without the
discipline in the meetings, the boys that behave will get tired of
being neglected (or being punished) because of others misbehaving.
Then they will either look to drop out, or decide to join in the
misbehaving. In fact, lack of discipline in meetings has continually
shown up as a top factor in why boys leave scouting.
>From what I have seen, even severe ADHD boys can control their
behavior enough that with a good program, a little extra supervision,
and a little understanding, they will not be monopolizing the leader's
time during meetings. And so long as they see the punishments as
fair, they are generally willing to abide by them.
In both my current troop and my former troop we had the "3 strikes"
policy -- if you get 3 strikes in a meeting you call home and get
picked up from the meeting (or the campout). I had a few boys who
would regularly get 2 strikes, but have only once in 2 years had one
pick up that 3rd strike. They could appreciate the limit, and while
they would often test it they were careful not to transgress it.
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City