Kevin S. Woods (kswoods@CHRISTA.UNH.EDU)
Wed, 1 Oct 1997 07:44:50 -0700
I feel the need for some counseling by other scouters...
We have 2 boys (twins)(app 14yo) who joined the troop about a year ago.
They had just moved to our "rural" town from an "urban" city. They were
"hot to trot" into the program. Uniforms with in a week, working on
advancement, really into it.
As the school year progressed, they became increasingly mouthy and
argumentative. at times they would call and ask me for a ride or a ride
home from the meeting. No real problem as I have my son and they live near
At one point, we were having a real problem with one of the boys. Mouth,
not participating, creating disturbances. I felt it had alot to do with
another scout who was behaving the same way. They reached a point where I
suspended them under the troop code of conduct rules. For 2 weeks. I
expected not to see the one scout return, but did expect to see the twin
After a few weeks, his brother told me his parents would not let him
return. I spoke to the mom and explained the purpose of the suspension and
that I felt he would not learn anything by being kept out. Both are very
Well trying to get to the point....Circumstances:
Dad works 2nd shift, mom does not want to drive at night, has 2 toddler
foster kids at home. I recently had to move mtgs to a Tuesday due to a
college course commitment.
Twins come to me last night and say it will be their last meeting because
they cannot get a ride. Mom says it is too much work to dress the toddlers
to bring them to meeting. Mom is mad because I moved the meeting to
Tuesday. Says they would not have registered except that Thursday nite
(the orig mtg night) was their dad's night off.
SOOOOO I am torn. I could fairly easily drive over and pick these kids up
each week. My problem is neither mom or dad have EVER called me or even
expressed a thank you at the end of a campout or when transporting THEIR kids!
When they pick them up from a campout it it hit and run, not a how do you
do or how did it go. No participation in troop activities. One twin is
still fairly mouthy and disruptive. Does not want to wear the uniform,
wants to play ball. (football or basketball)
One of the twins may not have much longer to go. He is getting alot of
peer pressure and is not really interested in working on advancement. I
have held some SM conferences with him and he seems to understand what the
program is about, but ??? I don't know?
The other truly seems to enjoy it. After a year, I finally convinced them
to go into separate patrols( the old love/hate competitive thing) I was
hopeful this would help them develop.
So...... Do I just become a taxi service and offer it up for the good of
scouting and call it my good deed for the day, or do I wait and see if they
This is long so please try not to reply with all of it back. I look
forward to the wisdom of the list! Thanks!
Kevin S. Woods
Scoutmaster Troop 111
Daniel Webster Council
Historic District DWC Training chairperson
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City