Some Humor, an Intro...
Bruce Major (major@GATOR.NET)
Fri, 26 Sep 1997 23:15:26 -0400
My name is Bruce Major. I am SM of Troop 84 in Gainesville, Florida, and
new to SCOUTS-L. On the off chance some of you have not seen this before,=
send it along for your edification. I found portions of it to, um,
resonate. : ) Enjoy!
YOU MIGHT BE TAKING YOUR SCOUTING TOO SERIOUS IF:
You buy that '89 Chevy Caprice because you really like that fleur-de-lis
Your favorite color is "Olive Drab".
You decide to lash together the new deck on the back of your house.
You plan to serve foil meals at your next dinner party.
You walk the streets in broad daylight with a coffee cup and flashlight
hanging from your belt.
You raise your hand in the scout sign at a heated business meeting.
You were arrested by airport security because you wouldn't give up your
official BSA =20
pocket knife until the cop said "thank you".
You didn't mind losing power to your house for three days.
Your son hides his copy of Boy's Life from you.
Your plans for remodeling the bathroom include digging the hole deeper.
You trade your 25 foot center console fishing boat in on that great littl=
15 foot canoe.
Your favorite movie is "Follow Me Boys" starring Fred MacMurray, and you
months trying to convince Disney to release it on home video.
You managed to find that 8th day in the week.
Your patron saint is Ward Cleaver.
You disconnect the automatic dishwasher in favor of the "3 pot method".
You sneak a cup of "Bug Juice" after the troop turns in for the night.
You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together.
Latrines at camp start becoming comfortable.
You felt you won a moral victory when BSA brought back knee high socks.
You think campaign hats are cool.
You gave your wife a mummy bag rated for -15 =B0 F for Christmas.
You name one of your kids Baden.
Your favorite tune is "Camp Granada" (hello mudda=85.hello fadda) by Alle=
You can recite the 12 points of the Scout Law backwards, in order, in 3
You bought 10,000 shares of Coleman stock on an inside tip they were abou=
to release a=20
microwave accessory for their camp stove line.
You can't eat eggs anymore unless they are cooked in a zip-lock bag.
You plan to get rich by writing a best selling Dutch Oven cook book.
You took a chemistry course at the local college to help you develop a
better fire starter.
You actually own a left-handed smoke shifter.
The height of your social season is the district recognition dinner.
A trip to Philmont is a pilgrimage.
You are convinced the center of the universe is Irving, Texas.
The sales operators at the BSA distribution Center's 800 number recognize
Singing "Scout Vespers" makes you cry uncontrollably.
You were disappointed when Scouting magazine didn't win the Pulitzer Priz=
The Scouts in your troop chipped in to have you abducted by a professiona=
Rate Yourself! 30-36 - Hopeless. 24-30 Condition is "serious" but not
18-24 You're OK , (I'm OK) but be careful. 12-18 You must be an SA.=20
6-12 - You obviously still have a life. Under 6 - Still in Cub Scouts,
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City