Re: MOM and SON, DAD and LAD
Marie E. Lackore (mlackore@ATHENET.NET)
Thu, 18 Jul 1996 09:45:00 +0000
> At 10:46 PM 7/17/96 +0000, Marie E. Lackore wrote:
> >MOM and SON is an event near and dear to my heart, so I feel that I
> >must put in my two cents worth regarding the name of this event.
> >MOM and SON is not the same as Parent and Son, nor should it ever be.
> > The MOM and SON relationship is a very special relationship, and the
> >focus of our entire weekend is on the MOM and SON. Not a detail goes
> >into the planning of the event without thinking how it will relate to
> >the MOM and SON relationship. We are going into our tenth year and
> >what we are doing must be working for we have MOMs and SONs that come
> >back year after year after year.
> Commendable. And what do you do for those children who don't have mothers
> or whose mothers cannot participate because of reasons beyond their control?
Never assume that there are not exceptions to the rule. However,
they are few and handled very diplomatically.
> My mother is paranoid schizophrenic. Fortunately, she now has effective
> treatment and one would never know that she is schizophrenic. Until 2 1/2
> years ago, she was a raving maniac. How would you handle this? It appears
> that your answer is that in your council, I would be barred from your
> "MOM and SON" event if I were a Cub Scout there, as my mother was
> incarcerated in a state mental institution.
Again, as I said, never assume there are not exceptions to the rule.
> How say you?
> My sister Patricia was struck and killed by a speeding car on April 24th.
> She left behind an orphan daughter. Let us stipulate for a moment that
> my niece is actually my nephew. By your stated logic in your previous
> postings, my nephew would also be barred from your "MOM and SON" event
> because he is an orphan.
> How say you?
Again, never assume there are not exceptions to the rule!
> A friend of mine who mentored me when I first became an Assistant
> Scoutmaster in 1971 is currently rearing two of his grandsons. The
> father is in a halfway house in drug rehabilitation. The mother is in
> another state. By your statements, these two boys are prohibited from
> participating in your "MOM and SON".
> How say you?
I don't think I need to say again!
> You also said:
> > Also, we can provide an event for those boys who don't have MOMs to
> > attend the MOM and SON event with them.
> Your wording clearly says that your council currently does not "provide
> an event for those boys who don't have MOMs". Is this true? If it is,
> then you blatently discriminate against Cub Scouts without mothers. If
> it is not, then you are practicing "separate but equal" Cub Scouting.
We provide many, many events for all types of activities and age
levels. No...we are not practicing separate but equal. Life is what
it is. Scout programs are always catering to certain groups.
If you really want to start defining what discrimination is, you
could have a lot of fun with many programs that Scouting has to
offer. No...we are not discriminating. We are serving a need.
Again, should we cancel Mother's Day because not everyone has a
Mother? I think not.
Should we cancel Veteran's Day because not everyone is a Veteran? I
Should we cancel Christmas because not everyone is a Christian? I
Look around you. The world is what it is. Families are falling
apart every day. Why? Because so many people no longer believe in
the family structure and what it stands for. We need to get back to
basics. We need to provide events that cater to the family as a
whole. We need to provide events that cater to the individual
Scouts. We need to provide events that cater to the MOM and SON
relationship. We need to provide events that cater to the DAD and
LAD relationship. It is all these parts that make the whole. Life
is but one big triangle, if you may, and each little piece is a
> I applaud your intent. However, your focus is not upon the children we
> serve in Cub Scouting, but rather upon the mothers of those children.
Please do not tell me where my focus is. You do not know me. I
happen to be very proud of the fact that I have provided an event for
over 2000 MOMs and SONs each year. The survey that I have done the
past two years tells me that we are right on target. I would be more
than happy to share some of those comments with you.
> Were it otherwise, you would structure your event so as to be open to
> all of the Cub Scouts in your council. As it stands, you arbitarily
> bar from participation the less fortunate Cub Scouts in your council
> and speak in casually passing of another event that will be open to
> them if you ever get around to implementing it.
I really do not appreacte the comment "if you ever get around to
implementing it". That was certainly a slam, and I did not deserve
it. It will be implemented. We are committed to providing yet
another great event in our council to serve yet another need that
I am proud of what I have done for Scouting. There is so much more
to do, and I hope I have enough time to make a serious dent. I also
know and appreciate that there are so many other people in Scouting
who have done and accomplished so much more than I.
> It is obvious that you feel strongly about the "MOM and SON" event in
> your council. The supporters of "separate but equal" schooling in the
> Jim Crow south felt equally strongly about the benefits of segregated
> I personally like neither segregated schooling nor segregated Scouting.
> IMHO, the focus of your event needs to be upon the child rather than
> upon the mother.
The child you speak of is a boy who is a fourth or fifth grade
Webelos or a Boy Scout. He is beginning to grow into a young man
before his mother's very eyes. He now has interests that most often
times do not include his mother. All we are doing in this council is
providing a weekend and a vehicle for this MOM and SON to spend
quality time together. That is not wrong.
> As always, your mileage may vary.
> Yours in Scouting,
> Rodger Morris <firstname.lastname@example.org>
> Scoutmaster, Troop 852 Woodbadge 416-18
> Ventura County Council Philmont, 1973
> Camarillo, California, USA "I used to be a Beaver..."
Marie E. Lackore
Bay-Lakes Council #635
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City