Re: excluding cubscouts at meetings
Mark Wilson (mwilson@POLARIS.ORL.MMC.COM)
Fri, 4 Feb 1994 11:56:41 EST
> From: gloria <firstname.lastname@example.org>
> Could someone answer this question? Can a cub/Webelo leader threaten to
> not let a member in the den to attend meetings if he continues to be noisy,
> showing boredom,or not pay attention during an outing?
A leader can and should take steps to remove a boy who is being disruptive.
Keeping a disruptive kid around is not fair to the other boys. It also sends
the message that that type of behavior is acceptable. Pretty soon they will
all be cutting up. No leader should make threats, though. They should simply
communicate what the rules and consequences are.
> After our pack meeting last night, the two women leaders called the parents
> together (5 mothers of 8 cubs--two of the mothers being the leaders) and
> gave us a hand written agenda,twice stating that if any member continues
> to be noisy, show boredom at outings, or not pay attention while at an
> outing, will be excluded from any further den participation, and they told
> us that we need to "get" our sons to behave in the meetings.
I'd catagorize this as leaders who expect to much. Cub Scouting is supposed
to be fun and boys Cub Scout age who are having fun will be a little loud
and a little rowdy. If they seem bored with an outing, it may not be their
fault. It could be a boring outing. Basically the leaders need to understand
that they are dealing with boys not small adults.
On the other hand, the boys need to understand that there is a time for
cutting up and a time to be quiet and pay attention. That is what the Scout
sign and the conduct candle (or similar devices) are for. In addition, parents
do need to reinforce that message to help the Den Leaders.
> But if my son were to fit the above description, it doesnt matter what
> threats, or incentives I might offer my son, if he is going to act up, I
> cannot control him.
> The schools have taught the kids well in what measures parents can impose
> on their children, or not impose on their children to "make them behave".
> My son informs me on his interpretation of that.
Yep, my son did that, too. Once. He informed us that if we spanked him, he
could turn us in. My wife and I sat him down and explained to him just what
would happen if he did that. He was told that it was possible that the state
could put one or both of us in jail, and place him, his brother and his
sisters in foster homes or some other institution (and not neccisarily the same
one), and that they could decide that we could not get them back. In the
end he agreed that reporting us for disciplining him might not be such a good
idea, that such actions should be for serious problems. It seems that the school
are good about telling one side of the story but not so good at telling about
the possible consequences. Our state HRS also has a reputation for over reacting
on less than complete information.
> ... the leader was assistant scoutmaster ...
For future reference, the actual position is 'Assistant Cubmaster.'
> I struggle to get my son to want to go to the meeting and to do badge work,
There are two possible problems here. One is that the meetings are not keeping
his interest. No one, especially boys, wants to go be bored for an hour when
they can do something else. The other is that he just doesn't want to be in
Cub Scouts. From what you have said I rather think that it is the former,
perhaps in combination with not knowing the other boys.
> Is there something in the leader's guide books which state the leaders can
> exclude a boy from participation (or boys) because they showed disinterest
> or boredom
As I said before, boys should be excluded for disrupting the meeting or outings.
If the program is not interesting to them, then the leaders need to adjust the
meeting content and the outings to increase interest.
You might suggest that the leaders involve the boys more in deciding what they
do in the meetings (what we sometimes call guided discovery works best to
keep their ideas in line) and where they go for outings. They could also use
a dose of KISMIF.
Just my two cents, but I must have learned something after doing this stuff
for seven years.
Mark Wilson email@example.com
Eagle Class of '74 863 Trumbull Street
SM, Troop 565 Deltona, FL, 32725
WL, Pack 565
I used to be an antelope ....
My opinions are my opinions. Martin Marietta can speak for itself.
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City