Funny magazine article
James Demes (demes@FREEZER.CNS.UDEL.EDU)
Tue, 21 Apr 1992 23:25:19 EDT
The following article is from ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY magazine's April 17, 1992
issue - thought some of you might find it amusing and/or interesting:
BOY SCOUTS VS. 'THE LAST BOY SCOUT': PREPARED FOR THE WORST
Complaining that the gleefully brutal film is not consistent with its values
and aims, the Boy Scouts of America sent a letter of protest to the producers
of the metaphorically titled LAST BOY SCOUT. But a closer look shows that
Bruce Willis' detective Joe Hallenbeck really honors most of the tenets of the
Boy Scout Law - in his own way.
* TRUSTWORTHY - He keeps his promises: "If you touch me again, I'll kill you."
* HELPFUL - After catching his wife with his best friend, he offers her useful
advice. She: "I was lonely." He: "Buy a dog."
* LOYAL - He sticks by his friends. Wayans [costar]: "You don't like [your
wife] much, do you?" Willis: "At least I liked the guy she was f---ing."
* CLEAN - On breaking into an apartment, he thoughfully warns Wayans, "Don't
touch anything - we don't want to make a mess for the cops."
* FRIENDLY - Held at gunpoint, he entertains a would-be assassin with hail-
fellow-well-met banter: "I'm not saying [your wife]'s fat, but her high school
picture was an aerial photograph."
* REVERENT - He respects the sanctity of family: "[My daughter]'s 13 years old,
and if you even look at her funny, I'm gonna stick an umbrella up your ass and
* COURTEOUS - Before punching a senator, he inquires about his preference:
"Head or gut?"
* CHEERFUL - Starting each morning with a positive attitude, he tells himself,
"Smile, you f---."
* THRIFTY - He saves money on cigarettes by picking up pre-smoked butts from
The above article is accompanied by a cartoon of Bruce Willis in a BSA
uniform with his right hand in the Scout sign and the cigarette dangling from
his smiling mouth lighting a bomb in his left hand - very well done!
Now, I've never seen the movie (I'll rent it sometime), so I can't offer my
opinion of it. The point of this article isn't to start up a flame war or
anything like that. If you're upset that I posted this, send me email.
By the way, EW gives the movie a C-.
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City